just do it

it's located at get a map, and fuck off

relief

The truth of this all hasn't hit me yet.
My first initial reaction was to cry; .but I just couldn't. It didn't feel right.
Right now, in this very moment I feel relieved.
There will be no more sacrifices for you.
So you can go ahead and be with her.
I hope she can give you everything you wanted.
I'm not sorry anymore that I couldn't.
You no longer deserve that part of me.

this feeling

All I want is for him to want to be with me the way that I do.

insecurity

I thought I could let go of everything you've done so we could move forward.

I shouldn't have to feel insecure if I'm with you. But I'm always questioning everything we have.
When you look at me I don't feel admired;

When you touch me I don't feel loved;

When you say 'I promise' I don't trust you.

So why?

Why do I choose to put myself through this heartache?

I hope I can find my worth in myself; without you.
Because these demons in my head keep telling me that I'll never be enough.

fuck yea buddaaaay

dodge

You do a really good job at avoiding the question.
You talk about irrelevant subjects that don't answer what I'm asking.
You need to be blunt with me. Be as straight forward and to the point as possible.
Your not protecting me by dismissing the truth.
I just want to know where we stand once and for all.
I need to know so I can start to move on with my life. Don't be selfish and keep me for your ego.
Let me go if you don't want me the way I want you.

I want to be free

I close my eyes and I'm home.

e-mail

It's all about sacrifice with you.
I've given up pretending not to care, because you'll see me and know that I still do.
I've never stopped loving you.
I only went numb when you were away, keeping my thoughts in the back of my mind.
I just poured out everything I've been thinking to you.
Sorry it was in an e-mail.

where am I going to end up?
after this is all said and done; where?
how many more answers can you give me till you know it's the right one.

through these dark hours

will I get out of this little hell?

these thoughts in my head

your coming home soon, and I don't know what to do.
I'm probably over thinking everything.
You don't owe me anything, and I most certaintly owe you nothing.
It's going to bother me you know, wondering whether or not you'll call me when you get home.
Will you?
I already have the image painted in my head. -waking up that morning, waking up on that date; knowing what it means. I'll have my phone on silent, but what does that count when I'll be checking it non-stop. Then the day will be over, and maybe I'll hear from you.
Why does it matter anyway? Why do I have this built up in my head so much?
You and I, we tried and we can't be together. 
So why am I investing so much on this day? On this call that might not happen?
Even if it does, what difference will it make?
We can't go anywhere.
misery.